Snow time!

Normally I'm not a huge snow fan(really it's more the cold that I'm not a fan of, more than the actual snow), as I've mentioned before, but I Patrick seemed so fascinated by it that I couldn't help but take him outside for some fun.  I swear, he spends at least 20 min. every morning just staring outside, like playing in the snow is his biggest dream in life.  Luckily, he had a snow suit that kind of fit him from last year so we bundled him up and went outside.

Our dogs decided to join in the fun as well.

And our little, pathetic snowman.  But, Patrick had fun taking it apart so I guess that's all that really matters.

15 months

I know 15 months is kind of a random time to update about Patrick's milestones but it's been awhile and I wanted to include this cute picture in the blog(Aubree took this up at the cabin during the family reunion).

Some little things about Patrick right now:

-He loves blowing kisses and giving kisses.  Our dogs are a little frightened by this but the rest of us love it
-He's getting better at giving real hugs.  Again, our dogs are not thrilled about this
-He waves hi and bye.  For some reason when people used to say bye to him, he would just blow a kiss but he's finally gotten down the waving thing.
-He understands simple commands like, "Let's put those toys away," or "let's close the door," or "bring me your shoes."
-He loves trying to help clean up around the house.  If there's a mop or broom around, he is more than happy to push it around "helping"
-Something he started doing a couple months ago is that he would get a diaper and wipe out of his diaper bag, bring it to us and then poop in his diaper.  Sometimes he would poop first and then bring us all the stuff but either way, we know poop is on the way when he starts going through his diaper bag.
-Cupboards and drawers are still a constant fascination to him.
-Favorite "toys" include: cooking utensils, pots and pans, pens and pencils, and electronics with buttons.  He'll play with actual toys but for some reason he's really drawn to anything in the kitchen
-He moved down to one nap a day about a month ago.  Patrick adjusted really well but it took me a little longer to get used to.  I really loved that shower time in the morning...
-He doesn't seem overly interested in mastering more words than nana(banana, although recently he's using that word for anything he wants at the time), mama, dada.  He talks a lot and gets quite animated sometimes, but it's still mostly just babbling.  He does try to copy our words more and more so he's imitated words like; bye, hi, and ok, but they're not really constant enough for me to say that he really knows what they mean.

I don't know what we'd do without this little guy.  I feel like he's just so sweet and innocent still and has a way of helping us forget, for a moment, how hard life is.  His cute laugh never ceases to lighten the mood...except for when it's a mischievous one from him knowing he's getting into something he shouldn't.  Which happens quite often now.  I'll admit I get exhausted chasing him with his endless amount of energy, but I still love him more than I can put into words.  Happy 15 month birthday, Patrick!

Blackburn Family Reunion

I have to say, Kami and Aubree outdid themselves with planning the family reunion.  Here's how planning events usually goes with me: I look up a million idea, have something amazing planned, realize it's all too expensive and takes a lot of time, so I go the other extreme and don't do much of anything.  Sooo...good thing I haven't been in charge of one of these yet.  If I am, I'll have to plan like a year in advance.

We went up to Mike's family cabin(Aubree's husband) and did a lot of this:

                                                  

 And some cute crafts.  Patrick pretty much loved the stuff we made with the kids.  Even after we got home, he still played with these glow sticks and his lantern and the Frankenstein noise maker(I should have added a picture of it)

 And some late night minute to win it games.  Notice Jon's dad in the background?  I think this was at 11ish and we were all pretty surprised he was still up since he goes to bed around 9.  Actually, I'm surprised I was still up.  Not gonna lie, I'm horrible at late night.  After mono, getting pregnant, having Patrick and now being pregnant again, I feel like my body just gets worn down faster and faster.  I don't mean this as a complaint, but if someone has some energy boosting ideas feel free to spread the knowledge(besides exercising becomes while it makes me feel better in lots of ways, and I love it, it doesn't necessarily give me more energy).  I'm tired of being the party pooper. ;)

And then we spent some time enjoying how beautiful it is out in nature

...I won't mention the part about how tiring it is having LOTS of little babies around trying to sleep in close range of each other.  There might have been some late nights and early mornings.  Thanks again Aubree and Kami for putting so much effort into everything!

Catch-Up

It's been awhile so really this is just a catch-up of what we've been doing lately.  I know, since my life is so interesting, that you all have been checking your computers every single day to see when I would update it again. ;)

So, firstly, my dad's headstone got installed and it's perfect.  To be honest, I think it will take awhile before I get used to seeing my parent's name on a headstone.  Going to the cemetery always has a way of bringing on the tears and feelings of complete loss, mixed with a sense of peace. 

This last Saturday, in between sessions, Mike blessed their baby boy, Marcus.  We found out this last week that Mike is going to Afghanistan for the next year.  I'm pretty sure I'm not strong enough to handle having a husband in the military.  This is his 4th time going overseas.

Mike, Jen, Marcus, Cannon, Ada

Family on the Blackburn side

Also, I have to keep up the tradition from last time of posting bad lighting and not so attractive pregnant pictures.  Just over 4 months down and just over 5 months left to go.  Next doctor's appointment, we find out the gender. :)  I already knew what Patrick was by this time so I'm practicing my patience this time around.  Although, overall, I'm not as impatient to have the baby come as I was the first time.  The only reason for my impatience now is so that I can stop feeling this crappy morning sickness.  It's still my constant companion, 24/7, but like I mentioned in the last post, I'm grateful it eased off a little bit from the first trimester.

It's a good thing these cute little people are worth anything we have to go through to get them here. ;)

Side note: Patrick loves laundry baskets. Who knew they were so cool to hang out in? 

   A few days ago, I was mentioning to my mom that it's hard to really think that anything happening now is of much significance because of everything that's happened this summer.  I know it is, and since this is our family journal, I need to keep this updated but it's been harder than usual.  Conference came at the perfect time for a little pick me up.  Not that it makes life perfect, but it's always great to be reminded why we're here and what we're capable of doing.

Guess What?

Baby #2 is on the way, due March 22nd.  Today was my first appointment and everything looks great.  I waited longer this time to go to the doctor because I wanted to avoid some of the awkward first visit stuff.  Yeah right.  There's just no dodging that bullet.  But the good thing is, we got to see our baby squirm around and hear the heart beat.

During this picture I was excited to be pregnant.  About a week later, morning sickness hit.  And, I have to admit I was far from excited and more than a little emotional about it.  To be honest(which I usually am on this blog), there was a good solid couple months where every single day I thought, "I can't do this again."  Trying to cope with the loss of my dad topped with 24/7 morning sickness that made me not want to get out of bed made for a rough couple of months.  I'm thankful to have an understanding husband and mother who fed Patrick every single meal because I couldn't stand the thought of even feeding myself.  And, I'm thankful I have such a sweet little boy who loves me, even when I'm sick and forget I love being a mother.

But really, now that I'm starting to feel better each week, we are excited and nervous to meet this next baby in 6 months. Right now I worry about how I'll love another child as much as I love Patrick, and I worry about him getting jealous, but I know we will gladly welcome and love every baby that is meant to come into our family.

A trip to the Zoo

Jon's sister, Kami, was visiting Rexburg for a few days so she mentioned going to the zoo in Idaho Falls.  Patrick loved it, as did we.  I've actually never been to the zoo before this and I was pleasantly surprised.  Even though it's small, there were some fun animals to look at.

  

Little family picture on a fake tiger

Ada and Afton

Jon, Patrick, Cannon, Kami and Afton

Another family picture in front of a real tiger...which you can't really see.

Other things we've done this summer...

 More park dates with me and Patrick.  He loves the rocks.

 And this picture is just here because I think Patrick is so cute. :)

62

Today is my dad's 62nd birthday.  While we all wished we were celebrating with cake and presents, instead we celebrated by going to the temple and my dad's grave-which ended up being the best way possible for me to feel close to him.  This morning I couldn't help thinking about my birthday 3 months ago when my dad asked to call me on the phone for my birthday.  I answered and the first thing he said was, "Is this Natalie?  This is daddy poo.  Happy Birthday!"  And I was taken back to when I was 6 years old all over again.  It was a tender mercy-a moment my dad knew exactly what he wanted to say and probably what I needed to hear.  But today, I know my dad is watching over all of us, cheering us on when we have harder days, like today, and knowing it won't be that long till we all see each other again.  Happy Birthday, Dad.

1st Birthday

I'm a little behind on the blog but I realized today I hadn't posted pictures of Patrick's birthday parties.  Saturday(July 21st) was his party with everyone because it was easier for everyone to come then instead of on Monday so on Monday, July 23rd, we had a smaller party.  So, here is a picture overload.

 This is my first ever fondant cake.  The fondant was easier to make and work with than I thought but more time consuming.  It's not perfect but Patrick loved it.

 I realized the day of his party that I hadn't gotten him a birthday outfit or anything, so I improvised...

 Fortunately and unfortunately, the fondant kept the cake pretty well together so Patrick didn't get nearly as dirty as he could have.   I think that picture is when Afton was trying to get the cake from Patrick but there was no way he was handing it over.

 Opening gifts


These next pictures are from Monday, the actual day of his birthday.

My mom got Patrick crayons and he's pretty much played with them everyday since.  Eating them, "drawing" with them, trying to feed them to the dogs...sometimes he gets them out just to be able to hold one crayon in each hand.  Hours of fun.

This is the cake my mom made for him.  The bigger one was for everyone and the smaller for Patrick.

 Definitely the kind of cake that will cause the classic, cake all over the face, picture.

I'm pretty sure after eating two cakes of pure sugar over the course of 3 days, he was on a little sugar high.  I couldn't look at cake or cupcakes afterwards...still can't.

We had a lot of fun planning/celebrating Patrick's birthday and spoiling him rotten, but I would be lying if I didn't say my dad's presence was greatly missed.  As much as we were trying to have fun, there was an underlying feeling of sadness, wishing my dad was there to celebrate with us.  Apparently my dad had picked out Patrick's card before he died and it was really touching to open that card and see that it was from Grandma and Grandpa.  He also had picked out some art supplies from school that he had wanted Patrick to have so it was sweet to give those to Patrick.  Which, again, Patrick carries around everyday.  I'm constantly finding rulers, crayons, erasers and colored pencils in random places.  I hope he loves art like his Grandpa.

 Patrick's birthday brought back memories of my own birthdays growing up because my dad was always such a huge part of those.  He was definitely not one of those dads that stood in the background, watching everything the wife had planned.  He loved to dress up as a clown for comedy, put on magic shows, and just overall entertain all of the kids.  We all loved it when he "magically" pulled quarters out of everyplace possible.  I'm pretty sure we made him do it over and over at one of my parties.  My mom said he even helped with drawing things on all of our fancy cakes.  I didn't realize how much I loved his involvement in everything until it wasn't there.  I couldn't believe how hard it hit me and how difficult it was for me to accept the fact that my dad would never do a magic show at one of Patrick's birthdays.

 I can't believe all the things that have happened in Patrick's short year of life and in some ways I wish I could go back to July 23rd, 2011.  Time went by too fast.  But, since I can't go back to that time when I thought life was finally settling down and I was just happy to have a sweet, new baby, here's to hoping this next year will be full of moments of healing and peace.  Happy Birthday, Patrick.      

Catch-Up

While this month has had it's emotional times, we've tried to have fun as well.  I looked through some pictures on my camera the other day and realized I have a lot of pictures on there that I haven't shared yet.  Mostly of Patrick. 

These are pictures from the 4th of July.  In honor of my dad, we went out to breakfast since that was something he loved doing.  That afternoon we had lunch outside in the yard, played some croquet and ended with fireworks.  A nice, relaxing day.

Patrick's version of croquet

This is what Patrick thought of the fireworks.  He was curious at first but it quickly turned into terror

Patrick has also discovered that sprinklers are pretty much the greatest thing ever.

Patrick had his one year old doctor's appointment. He did well at the doctor's office but the worst part for him was having to hold still while they collected his blood.  Not the poking part, the holding still part.

This past month Patrick has perfected the whole walking thing.  He even tries running now but that usually ends with a face plant and some cuddling from his mom.  His vocabulary includes: mama, dada, baba, num(so cute-he says it when he likes what he's eating) and nama or ahma(depending on the day) which means grandma.  I can't guarantee he'll direct those words to the right person or object all the time but he tries.  And when we correct him, he thinks it's funny.  He gives kisses to everything, including tv remotes, dogs, people and sometimes the floor.  He blows kisses, waves hi and bye and prefers drinking from cups.  I think he just wants to do what the grown ups are doing but the cup thing usually ends up in a soaked shirt if he does it himself.  He loves anything that lights up and makes noises and he himself likes to make noise, constantly trying to talk all day long.  He really is the sweetest one year old I know, but I'm a little biased.

 His stats at one year are:
-Height 31 in.-86th percentile
-Weight 23.6 pounds, 63rd percentile
-Head 19 in. -92nd percentile

He's starting to become tall and skinny just like his dad.  Short legs, big feet, big head, long body.  Just like his dad. ;)

Anyway, that pretty much sums up our month of July.  We've just been staying busy chasing Patrick around and trying to make the best of everything.  Jon just finished up his summer semester at school and we greatly welcome this 7 week break.  It's nice to have him available to chase Patrick around after he gets home from work. ;)  One more year of this school stuff...

Nostalgic

"Don't cry because it's over.  Smile because it happened." -Dr. Seuss

I came across this quote the other day and they've been words I've had to live by lately.  What I want to do is cry over everything that's over.  Patrick being a newborn, seeing my dad light up every time Patrick walked through their front door, being young and catching "water skippers"(does anyone know their real name?) in the ditch behind our house, running/walking behind my parent's house with nothing but fields and trees, being involved in the Folk Dance Festival every summer, going to West Yellowstone as a family, joking about my parents being too "lovey" in public, and just having my biggest worry be about whether my frog was buried properly or not.  Yes, I did make my dad bury graves in the middle of winter for various little animals...

I came by being nostalgic honestly.  It's always been fun to hear my parents talk about the days when us kids were little and remembering things I'd forgotten.  The past always seems much better in memory than it probably was actually living through it but I know we had fun.  A lot of fun. I've been pretty blessed all my life and now I really do just need to smile because it happened.  I need to smile because there are things happening right now.  Jon and I have started our own little family and hopefully we'll be able to make a lot of memories that Patrick and our future kids will be able to remember back to with a little nostalgia someday.  And right now, I get to see how much my mom adores Patrick and how he's changed my whole family's life for the better.  I get to see Patrick chase around all of his cousins, on Jon's side, and it makes my heart melt with how much he loves kids and people.  This Saturday, we're celebrating Patrick's birthday and I'll get to start the same traditions of having fancy cakes(if I learn to be talented like my mom was) and fun parties with lots of family and friends. We are so blessed.  Life is hard, but we are still blessed.  Even though some phases of life end, new phases start and I'm so lucky to be able to constantly look back on life with feelings of happiness.

Today I'm nostalgic, yesterday I was tired, the day before I was angry and the day before that I was probably happy.    I hope as time goes on, the feelings of happiness will start to outweigh the other emotions for all of my family but for now, I just need to keep reminding myself to smile because it happened.